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| Granpa Carlos, Christmas 2009 |
Granpa Carlos Chaidez Was 88 Years Young.
Watching someone pass is not an easy thing to do. My Granpa Carlos passed away this Sunday at 12:24am. The road to his deliverance was a long road with many turns. Granpa leaves behind so many people who love him and will miss him terribly. Being a war veteran and loved by so many people in his community I am sure his services will be overflowing with friends and family. Those of us who are planning his services want to celebrate his life. We want to show everyone how fun and loving my Granpa Carlos was.
My Uncle Danny bought for Granpa a parrott many years ago. Granpa loved his Paco and would lovingly call him Pacito. Paco loved Granpa back just as equally. Growing up we would hear Paco calling for Granpa. "Carlos!" "Carlos!" and "Praise The Lord!" when he would see him. Funny thing is Paco would sound just like Granma calling for Granpa as he would work on the yard. At the time they kept animals for food so Granpa was often outside when she called for him. I have never seen a bird more frantic the day of Granpa's death. Paco has always been nice to me. Never lunged at me but on Saturday he would throw himself at his cage walls and screetch for "Carlos!" He was so frantic. He knew. Granma had granpa's bed put in the first bedroom and one of Paco's cages was just outside that window so I'm sure he could sense Granpa was close. Later when Paco was moved to his garage for the night I went in and talked with him. After I calmed him down I told him what was happening. A few hours later Granpa passed and when I could I told Paco of his passing. He still called for "Carlos!" but he was not as frantic this time. He is such an intelligent bird. & he loved my Granpa so much.
We had a bittersweet blessing in that my cousin Carrie came and stayed with my granpa during his last days. I would love to say her presence was a soothing balm to both Granma and Granpa but it was nothing close to it. Guilt is a crazy thing and eats at people in such a way that it's destructive. As much as Carrie was not wanted or welcome at my Granpa's bedside she brought with her a man named Mike. I cannot describe to you the blessing Mike was to both my Granma and Granpa. Mike would carry Granpa wherever he needed to go. No task was too dirty, or demeaning for this man. Mike never once complained. He never once refused. Mike was always there for Granpa. Now Granpa had Mike to bellow for as well.
When I first arrived at my Granparents house Mike was in the room when we met with the Hospice nurse. The room cleared and it was just the two of us with Granpa. One look at that man and you could see his raw pain. I have never seen a more terrified person in my life. Mike is new to the Lord and still struggles with his faith. We embraced and he sobbed and sobbed. He told me how much he loved my Granpa and what a special privilege it was for him to be my Granpa's legs. Over the course of the night Mike would pull me aside and share a special memory he had of Granpa. How my crazy cousin found this beautiful man is beyond me. I have to believe we have The Lord to thank for sending us Mike.
Over the course of the day family arrived. Each in turn would go in and try to get alone time with Granpa. Even though death was imminent, laughter sounded in the house as we shared memories of our time with Granpa. Granma and Granpa finally had family and comfort around them. Not all were able to make the final trip down to say their goodbye's but those that could were finally here. My Uncle Charles was the last to arrive and after he had his moment with Granpa I went in his room once again to update him on our pilgrimages or messages sent. This time I told Granpa that now we were ready to let him go to The Lord. He had met his part of the bargain and was free. You see, Granpa has been telling us all along he was ready; just last week he said he was going to die in a week but he stayed for us to gather, still meeting his prediction.
Granpa loved my Granma Bertha very much. Over the last few months he was happiest with her by his side. He was relentless in his calls for her. He was jealous of any time she spent away from him. She was exhausted by his demands for her. But she loved him and answered his calls for her. We feared a third mini stroke with him pushing her so hard. Now the house is quite and some family have gone to their homes to return in the morning. Granma gets her time with Granpa and he opens his eyes Heavenward, however briefly when she enters. As she is sitting there holding his hand, just the two of them, she felt a sudden heat flash up her arm. This startles Granma so much she opens the door and beckons me in. One look and I call quietly to my Dad, then knock on Uncle Charles's door. Carrie & Mike join us. We check his breathing and pulse. Praise The Lord Granpa is now returned home!
Even though Granpa was heavily medicated on Morphine so as to reduce his pain, on oxygen to help him breath, and unable to open his eyes or speak with us - he gave me a kiss, leaned into my cousins Lynelle's kiss, and left this world holding his loves hand.
Until Next Time, SoCal Marisa
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